Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Friend's Escapades: A Cold Disappearance

A few days ago, during my time of writing my tell all blog entry about the relationship the changed my life (coming very soon), one of my girlfriends called to have girlfriend talk; I have her permission to share this with you.  She told me that she was finished and done with her Boo.  I was a little set back because she had meet him about a month ago and she was all gung ho about him. So of course I had to ask her for details.  She opened up the flood gates and went to sharing. 

She met this guy on Facebook and they started texting and messaging from that point on. He is her fraternal brother so of course she knew she had snagged a potential partner. He was on her level.

She went on to say they meet up one weekend and she had a blast with him. He even went so far as to introduce her to his parents and other family members; sounds great, doesn’t it?  They bonded like a true couple. The conversations had turned into spending more time together.  They even scheduled weekend getaways in the near future.  Things were looking up until he got the “crumb cake”.

After getting the crumb cake, he still texted and called, but his behavior towards her changed.  He deleted and blocked her on Facebook. He lied about doing that, in which he said the he did not do that, giving the side-eye! His toned changed with her. The last straw with him came the weekend of Memorial Day.

They had made plans to go to the beach. He was going to ride the bus due to mechanical problems with his car. They decided to meet up state Louisiana. He texted her and told her that he missed the bus but had gotten on the morning bus.  They continued to text back and forth throughout the time he was “supposed” to be on the bus.  She decided that she would start out her journey to their meeting point.  She was supposed to travel three hours to meet up with him then they would continue on with their road trip.

Well, she arrived and texted him to let him know she had made it. He asked her why did she leave and she replied that she wanted to go ahead and be there when he would arrive.  The freaking dude, didn’t not respond to that message and any further messages.  He didn’t even have the decency not to call or text her to let her know he was not going to show up or explain his disappearing act.  She went on to call him and text him even after she spent the weekend alone. Like I said, this idiot NEVER responded (even until today)! 

In this case, I can only determine that he only wanted the crumb cake, point blank period!  This was the first that I have known a guy to introduce a “just a notch on the belt” to their parents.   

Again, like I have said before, why do this? He could have been honest with her and told her that he wasn’t interested in a relationship or he wasn’t feeling her anymore. Why make her make a ghost trip, shell out expenses and not give her an explanation? Any advice for her?


  1. Honey men do all kind of low down ish. She should have just let his nose soak in the cake instead of the pipe in plumbing. But it's all good, tell her shit happens but life goes on.

  2. your friend has to assume some responsibility in this situation. you can't be all wrapped up in somebody that you met a month ago. i've never understood why women feel the need to rush into a "relationship" and are so quick to throw that label on a situation that clearly is along the lines of "getting to know someone". does meeting ones parents make you feel validated? if so, why? if this is something he does on a regular basis - his family is used to it. if this man lied and stopped communicating with you, WHY continue with plans to meet him anywhere??

    1. You are completely correct that she needs to own her part in this. And she is totally accepting that she got played. I told her that, now you have to learn from this and try not to put yourself back in a situation like this again. Honestly, he had her confused about the entire situation. She was his "girlfriend"! A play on words! He didn't stop communicating with her before the "planned" trip. It was after the trip when he completely disappeared on her. As far as family, I haven't ran into any men that introduce all his possibles to his family.

  3. She got the 'ole "Okie Doke!" She should have left that cake in the freezer for at least a year before sharing it with him. Yes..."shit happens!" But two things worry me about this. (1) Ole dude just screwed it up for the next man (pun partially intended) that may enter her life. (2) That "next man" could be the "Man lead to her" and she may think about the last fool that "ate and left without paying the tab" and dismiss him. Anyway, I hope she learned a valuable lesson. Most importantly not ALL MEN ARE DOGS like that one, and I hope she makes smarter decisions on who she lets in her "cookie jar." I wish her LOVE in abundance thus far.